Cats and Dogs
by Gord and V
Summary: Legolas and Aragorn get into a fight about cats and dogs; which one is better?


**Disclaimer:** I'm typing this on my computer!!!!! The normal words and whatnot...

Totally random idea that came to me on the bus ride home. The amazing things on a yellow large car...Personally I'm more a dog person. Most likely OOC because there are betters things to worry about besides which are better: cats or dogs.

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"Cats."

"Dogs."

"Cats."

"Dogs."

"Cats!"

"Dogs!"

"CATS!'

"DOGS!'

"Why are two yelling!" Legolas and Aragorn looked up from their heated discussing to Gimli who just returned, arms full of firewood.

"Aragorn does not agree with me that cats are better than dogs"said Legolas proudly.

"Nay Legolas! Dogs are much more better than cats"replied Aragorn. And they began to bicker back and forth, until Gimli grew tired of their voices.

"Why don't ya just shut up and go somewhere else! Your giving me a headache!"

"How about you just name off the better qualities?"suggested Gandalf.

"Who will keep score?"asked Pippin.

"Who is impartial?"asked Aragorn, determined to win.

"Ay, I care for neither cats nor dogs"said Boromir.

"Well"began Legolas, "Cats are much cleaner than filthy dogs." Boromir held up one finger.

"Dogs are clean you lying elf!"cried Aragorn.

"They are not!"said Legolas before they bickered back and forth with 'are too' and 'are not.'

"HOW about a vote"said Gandalf quickly.

"Who says cats are cleaner than dogs?" Legolas quickly raised his hand, followed by Gandalf, Sam, Gimli, Merry and Pippin.

"And who says dogs are just as clean if not better?"asked Aragorn, who raised his hand followed, though no one else did.

"Frodo, you are not voting?"asked Sam.

"Nay, I would rather not become part of this. Though it is a bit amusing to watch"said Frodo, who indeed enjoyed this light hearted conflict.

"Well, one for cats"announced Boromir.

"Dogs are smarter! You cannot teach a cat to do anything!"said Aragorn taking his turn.

"You can teach a cat a trick"replied Legolas coldly.

"Vote again"sighed Boromir.

"Who says dogs are smarter?" All but Legolas raised his hand. Boromir raised a finger for Aragorn.

"Cats do not follow sticks when thrown! It's idiotic!"said Legolas.

"Maybe but it's funny to watch"said Pippin.

"Dogs are loyalier than cats! Dogs have be known in cases to save lives"said Aragorn.

"What do you mean save lives?"asked Legolas.

"Dogs have been known to save drowning people, go into burning houses to save people, and alerting people. And I would not be surprised if a dog alerted a human if a cat got stuck up a tree"mused Aragorn smirking at the elf.

"Cats are more graceful. They always land on their feet." Boromir now held up two fingers on each hand, frowning.

"You two are tied, two to two"said Boromir. Both wracked their minds for something.

"Dogs are kinder"said Aragorn.

"Nay, cats are, and you can tell when they are"said Legolas, "They pur." Boromir held up another finger for Legolas.

"But dogs are better for children. If you pull a cats tail it will attack the closest thing, but if you do that to a dog it will only yelp. Dogs are tolerate of small ones"said Aragorn. Boromir put down the thrid win for Legolas down, deciding how had one; cats pur or dogs are more tolerant.

"Boromir, they both receive another win"said Gandalf watcing the man's confusion.

"Well, we are stilled tied."

"Dogs are more fun then cats."

"They are not!"cried Legolas.

"Dogs will play fetch and swim and follow you"said Aragorn, "You cannot get a cat to play."

"Cats can play if you have string to play with them. And they will follow you for attention." Boromir held up another finger for each.

"You two settle this soon, I am running out of fingers."

"Cats are better fighters!"said Legolas after some thought.

"Hence the term 'cat-fight.'"

"Legolas, I was hoping of your life you would have picked up that means women fighting"said Gimli snickering. Legolas lightly blushed.

"Dogs are better fighters...though women fighting is dangerous too"said Aragorn. And they had to take another vote of who was the better fighter, dogs winning. And now Boromir held four fingers for Legolas, five for Aragorn.

"I do believer Aragorn is the winner"he said. Aragorn smirked at the defeated elf, who was desperately searching for another point. While this was going on, Frodo began to think why each has their preference.

"Legolas, why do you like cats more?"asked Frodo looking up. All looked from him to Legolas. Legolas opened his mouth as if to respond, but stopped.

"I do not know, but I know I do"he said after a moment's thought.

"Aragorn, why do you prefer dogs over cats?" Aragorn also took a moment's hesitation, before he responded.

"I do not know either, but I know I do."

"I may have an answer"said Frodo.

"Oh do tell Mr. Frodo"said Sam, very keen on his master's thoughts.

"Cats are like elves, humans like dogs." All pondered this, none understanding except Gandalf.

"Ah, very well thought Frodo"Gandalf said, smiling and chuckling.

"I do not get it"said Pippin.

"Well, compare humans and elves, the extremes I mean"said Gandalf.

"Elves are certainly cleaner"said Legolas, "Oh, no offense Boromir."

"None taken."

"And we humans like to get down and dirty"said Aragorn.

"And we have better eyesight, like cats"added Legolas.

"And we are more graceful, like balance as a cat."

"And we are more...oh what is the word I am looking for?" began Aragorn, trying to remember.

"What word?"asked Gimli.

"Like hardy but...not that word."

"Sturdy?"asked Pippin.

"Nay"replied Aragorn.

"Scrappy?"suggested Boromir.

"Yes! Humans are scrappier then Elves"said Aragorn. And both went back and forth comparing elves to humans, the occasionally, 'no offense' throw in.

"I do believe that is it"sighed Legolas as Gimli threw a log in, sparks flying up.

"I think I have a new appreciation of elves"said Aragorn as he leaned back.

"I believe I feel the same way about-" But Legolas never finished as Aragorn threw mud at him.

"I am certain that annoyed you." And the Fellowship left Legolas to chase Aragorn around, saying how terrible humans were.

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Would Aragorn throw mud at Legolas? No, but sure is funny :) That was fun. If you do review, tell me if your a cat person, or dog person.

Gord


End file.
